Monthly Archives: April 2015

Stop Calling Me Honey Bunny

Stop Calling Me Honey Bunny is a great example of what can be done with short film and is both entertaining and inspiring as it takes the simple premise of the rise and fall of a relationship and adds a twist to make things just that bit more hilarious.

At first, the couple starts off fast and furious jumping and humping each other wherever and whenever the feeling strikes. After a while, as they move into the relationship, the reality of accepting another into your daily life begins to take its toll and the excitement fades into the frustration of empty juice containers and early nights. But all is not lost as our furry heroes start their search to reignite the spark that had them exploring each other horizontally, vertically, and (one can only imagine) diagonally at some points!

This award winning short film written and directed by Gabrielle Zilkha works on many levels. First, as any great story should, it starts by raising a question: “What is going on in that bedroom?” Then, it immediately raises two others, “Why are they wearing bunny suits?” and “Are they ‘furries’, or actually bunnies?” What I loved writing wise was that little twist, the bunny suits. It adds that little bit more to the story that makes for more laughs and the ability to do things with the relationship-comedy premise that ensure a fresh take on what has been done in the past. As with all great scripts, it takes the simple and adds that necessary twist to transform the simple into the dynamic.

“What if two life-sized and lustful bunnies start to experience a sexual lag in their relationship?” Watch, love, laugh, and learn the answer! You will not be disappointed! Great job to all involved!

Check out the film at their Facebook page AND ALSO check out the contest! If you send an email – by April 20, 2015 to – with the names of 3 sex toys seen in the film, you can win a $350 gift certificate to chez noir!


The Writer’s Alphabet vol. 13; “M” is for Meaning


What is the meaning of this?!?!?!?!?!?!? What means something to someone can have no meaning to someone else. Meaning is subjective, or is it? The definition of something is empirical and is also its meaning. Though what that means differs from person to person to animal to animal to person. A ball means something different to a dog than it does to a person but its dictionary definition doesn’t change. The same thing goes for objects in a story.

Let’s look at the example of a scrap of paper with a phone number on it, but no name. To one character it could just be a scrap of paper without a name. This character could think that the person who wrote down his phone number without his name could be the biggest idiot flying around on the planet. The character thinks: Why the bloody hell would someone write down their number and not put down their goddamn identifier? What possible reason could exist for this? What if I were to call this idiot and then what? Hey fuckface, you didn’t leave your name on this scrap of paper. So ya, that’s one way it could go. Though it might end up with these characters falling in love over some shared antagonism and then they get married and instead of confetti the guests throw scraps of paper with random phone numbers on them and the couple worry about eye paper cuts. Because eye paper cuts might mean something great to one person, but to this couple, eye paper cuts are the worst thing since the bad yelp review they got at the restaurant they started.

Another character might think: I’m really glad I gave that new restaurant a bad yelp review. The whole thing was lined with scraps of paper with random phone numbers and because I am the loneliest fuck in the world I decided to call some of them. Some of the numbers were out of order and some were long distance. The ones that did go through just ended in screaming matches with the person on the other end because people keep calling the number and pranking them. I’m not pranking you, I yelled at each of them, I’m really just looking for a friend. They would usually say, good luck and go fuck yourself while you’re at it, to which I would reply, I’ll take that advice with a hunk of salt you dickhead. Who cares this much about scraps of paper? Assholes! That’s who! The burger was good though.

And another character might think: This is it. I’ve found it. This is the place with the phone numbers. It only took a year and three plane rides, but I’m here. Before this character walks in the door he stares through the windows at the majesty of the one place he has wanted to visit since he read about it in a magazine a couple years ago. They had to fact check the phone numbers that line the walls because of a rash of complaints and a lawsuit, but the idea behind the whole thing was magic. He had arrived and now that he was here all he could do is stare. Who’s that cute girl eating the soup and sandwich?

And finally: This lawsuit was the best idea I ever had. Mr. & Mrs. Owners, I thank you for settling with me. Free food for life? I’ll take it! Mmmmmm, soup. On Sundays this character liked soup and a sandwich. I liked the concept but who doesn’t check if the numbers are real? She takes a bite of her sandwich and looks up out the window at the guy who has been standing there for almost ten minutes. Holy shit man! What the fuck are you staring at? Go away you freak, I’m trying to eat this free soup!

I think I went on a bit of a tangent there but meaning means different things to different people. The most important thing is that what means something to a character means something to them for a reason. An emotional connection has the biggest stakes, but as long as there is a distinct meaning then all will be well. If not, it won’t make sense and then, well, just erase the whole story and start again. Yes, even if you have 130,000 words. Chances are you’ll have to do some major editing so just start over. Just kidding! Edit it!!!

My Polysyllabic Spree March 2015

200px-TheNewYorkTrilogycoverThe New York Trilogy by Paul Auster

An interesting read. So interesting I dog-earred a page and couldn’t remember why the hell I had done so. Thankfully, the second dog-earred page I came to had notes and it was just over half the way through. That said, Auster’s New York Trilogy is a great read overall. The three short stories connect well thematically and continue with Auster’s usual themes of loss of identity, loss of sanity, and the questions of disguise.

Time plays a role as well and how our perception of an event can be skewed when we reflect on how much time was involved with it.

The idea of writer’s as ghosts, from the second story – aptly titled Ghosts – is wonderfully explored and explained.

The third story, The Locked Room, is my favourite of the three I think because it is direct and there was less work on my part as the reader to decipher what exactly was going on. There were more parts in this story that I could relate to as well, so that probably has something to do with it.


neverletmegoaltNever Let Me Go by Kazuo Ishiguro

Ishiguro’s Never Let Me Go is beautiful. I have read many different reviews of this book some calling a masterpiece in subtle horror and others debunking that claim. All I can say is that, on the whole, this book is about the search for humanity. The idea of the human soul is explored and I love how Ishiguro relates the search for the soul directly to art. I’m not sure where – yes, I know I should probably research it – but I’ve heard that art in all its forms is the physical representation of the soul. This novel begs the questions, “What is the soul, and how can we prove its existence?” All the religious rhetoric and bullshit aside, the soul is simply the spark of life. Wherever this comes from I won’t hasten to guess and anyone who claims to know beyond a scientific explanation can do the long run off the short cliff, but I will say that Never Let Me Go examines the question(s) and takes up the conversation without making an ill-fated conclusion, because no conclusion is truly possible.

Ishiguro also captures emotion with precise perfection. I found myself feeling during the read. Those feelings were often mixed and like great art this book made me feel different things at the same time. It was an absolute beautiful bouquet of emotion.

Finally, this was one of those rare books that I didn’t want to end. Usually when a book is reaching its finale, things are wrapping up and the finish is welcome. When I approached the bottom of the penultimate page, I hope for another full one to follow. I was greeted with almost a quarter of a page and was grateful just for that.

Go and read this book. Now!



If-I-Loved-You-I-Would-Tell-You-This-194x300If I Loved You, I Would Tell You This by Robin Black

This collection of short stories is a slow build, but by the end I wanted more and more from each story. The shortest story, …Divorced, Beheaded, Survived, felt like it could have been the longest in that there was much more to explore, and I didn’t want it to end.

I felt that the overall theme of the collection was about loss, but to over explain I feel it was more like this: Nothing ends up like you thought it would but everything ends up like it should because that’s how it ended up. It is our ability to fill in the gaps between our expectations and reality – the one we create and the one created around us – that makes us who we are and determines our “happiness”, though happiness is fluid. In short, our happiness is determined by how much we fight accepting reality.

The book ends with one of the best descriptions of the fragility of life I have ever read. I won’t ruin it so you’ll just have to read!


Frankie&JohnnyFrankie And Johnny in the Clair De Lune A Play by Terrence McNally

This play was not what I expected but at the same time I can’t remember what I expected after reading it. It was far more explicit that what I would have expected and I enjoyed that because I feel it captures life, because life is explicit. I can’t remember what it was like in 1987 because I was seven but I assume this play was a bit risqué though not as much as I think it might have been.

McNally nails it overall but nails it right on its head near the midpoint and nestles inside the reader and audience member’s head with the dialogue and back and forth about “pardon my French”. Beauty job.

A side note: I watched the movie the next night and to say the least, it’s different. Some of what I read and pictured in the play holds up, but seeing as McNally also wrote the screenplay I wished he had keep more of the play to its form.

I want to see this produced on the stage!

April Preview: I’m going to finish The Savage Detectives and then read some other stuff. Not sure what yet.

What I’ve (Re)Learned March 2015

People will surprise you.

Surprises still exist.

It really does only take a moment to change everything.

Don’t over think your reactions to things. If it’s the right time for something your reaction will be “right”.

January, February, and March are the prologue months to the rest of the year.

Puppies have a lot of energy.

Still loving those naps.

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